From the outside... a pleasant three-bedroom home in Kew with period features and off-road parking.

On the inside... an eccentric bicycle museum, packed with history on two wheels.

The property's with Foxtons, priced at a catchy £949,949, and the vendors looking for a buyer who'll take the collection, too. Particulars here.

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According to this, James Taylor - a former associate of Grant Bovey, who managed to escape before the ship sank - is attempting to sell big old Gordon House in Richmond-upon-Thames for a whopping £25m. It's a big house, in a posh area, with a major architectural heritage... but:

Shortly before it was sold to Taylor [at the top of the market], Octagon, the developer which then owned the property, valued it at about £13m.

What's going on?

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"Ideally, I'd like a house on the green, near the theatre. It's just such an awesome place to hang out."

The rumour is that she's planning a permanent move to London, and that she's fixated on Richmond. The Rat and Mouse has made some tentative enquiries on her behalf, and finds that the options are very limited. She could just choose any house, grab the owners by the hair and hurl them howling into the night. A more conventional route, via Knight Frank, reveals this, not too far away from the awesomeness of The Green. It's currently three apartments, but it could easily be returned to its original and grand period shape. It's listed at £5m. Otherwise... agents... the ball's in your court.

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