Foreign readers, if you've found this message, please help me. I'm trapped on a small island just off the European mainland, with an unelected Prime Minister and an economy that's heading down the toilet. Meanwhile, the Deputy Prime Minister is hinting at a future in which the Government will pass laws that have the sole purpose of punishing individual citizens, in order to curry favour with the tabloid-reading masses. Please, have a heart... send help, invade, anything... SOS, SOS, SOS...