There are large LCD screens, each worth £1900, in both reception rooms, a small £400 television in the kitchen and TVs concealed in cupboards in the main, guest and children's bedrooms. Even the ensuite bathrooms have tellies built into the ends of the baths; the remote controls are designed to float, of course.

The flat, described here in the Telegraph, is in South Kensington's Onslow Square, and it's owned by property developer Anton Truter. And, apparently, he's not so freaky. A recent report reveals that the average UK home contains 4.7 televisions. The figures on either side of that mean are interesting too, and appear to confirm our secret snobbery. The highest UK ownership rate was in Ballymacbrennan in Northern Ireland (6.2 sets, several of which are probably hot); in Belgravia, the figure's just 3.1 sets. And what of the people without televisions? Have you noticed how desperate they are to portray themselves as "above" tv, and to make sure that you know they don't have room for such a contraption in their homes or their lives? Until you're so sick of hearing it that some internal irritation-inhibitor reminds you to stop asking them "hey did you see...?" An example? Here's television-free Libby, talking to the Telegraph... pay attention to how much information she manages to pack into her penultimate sentence:

"I'm almost embarrassed to admit it," says Libby. "People are always astonished when they find out. I feel such a luddite. But I've always got my art to do in the evenings and Ollie has his academic work. We don't have time to watch television.

Almost embarrassed to admit it... but... go on then.