A new survey by Post Office Home Insurance purports to suggest that while we love reading about celebrity cribs in the Rat and Mouse we wouldn't want to live right next door to one. But the figures aren't so clear. Almost half (46%) of the ordinary, boring, non-celebrities who gave up their time to be polled said they would, in fact, like to live next to a celebrity, and their celebrity of choice would be highly dependent on their gender. Men apparently quite like the idea of "popping next door" to see Jordan. Women prefer Beckham. And it looks like these respondents were old enough to know better, because there's a separate sub-result for women under the age of 24 in which Brad beats Beckham. Men of any age apparently still prefer Jordan. Meanwhile the over-55s - in an act so cliched I can't help suspecting purposeful obfuscation - nominated Cliff Richard. And the celebrity neighbour we'd like least? Gordon Ramsay. What's interesting about the poll is the [warning: sound file] Stella Street fantasy the idea of a celebrity neighbour seems to encourage... like, Ramsay will really be bellowing obscenities all day, Jordan's bound to be posing in a bikini, Cliff Richard will be humming wholesome hymns, Beckham will be reading Beano in his boxers. Okay, that last one might have the ring of truth... But from the emails we receive, having a celebrity neighbour is more like having no neighbour at all. More, here.